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online person-centred counselling for individuals &
couples and relationship therapy

Tom Cowan, person-centred counselling, Therapy for gay men


  • worry or anxiety

  • depression or low self esteem

  • thoughts and feelings related to past traumatic events

  • stress, overwhelming emotions or burnout

  • difficulty communicating your needs in intimate relationships

  • feelings of loneliness or isolation

  • issues around sexuality, gender or       relationships 

  • loss/bereavement


  • feel calm and connected

  • be respected, valued and heard

  • improve your mental health

  • reduce distress and anxiety

  • experience more positive thoughts and feelings towards yourself and others 

  • discover more meaning in your life

  • develop more confidence in your relationships​ with others

  • realise your potential

  • be supported to find strategies and solutions that suit you



I love questions!

I've answered a few and if there are more you want to ask then please do drop me an email. 

  • How much do you charge for sessions? Do you offer a reduction?
    My fees are: £60 for a 50 minute session - individuals £60 for a 50 minute session - couples. I am currently training as a couple and relationship therapist. I offer a concessionary rate to those under 25 in full time education. I set my fees at an appropriate rate to cover all my costs (listed below for transparency) and because I choose to prioritise seeing fewer clients I am able to offer you my full attention. These are some of my core costs, to give you an idea of where the session fees go. - Insurance - British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy registration and accreditation - Directory listings - Wix website and Zoom video conferencing subscriptions - Registration with the Information Commissioner's Office to protect the confidentiality of your data. - Monthly subscription to Google workspace - Continued professional development (minimum 5 days a year) - courses, studying, research that are connected to your issues so that I can be the best qualified practitioner to support you - Supervision with an experienced therapist where I regularly review my work - Administration costs in running a private practice - Tax and NI for HMRC as a self employed person
  • I want someone who has experience and knowledge as my counsellor. What are your qualifications?
    This is a great question and I'm glad you're asking it! Worryingly, anyone can call themselves a counsellor without having done any formal training. You should check that any perspective counsellor is qualified and on a Professional Standards Authority accredited register, like me. I have trained for many years to degree level and am a proud member of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy. They have lots of very useful information to help you understand how counselling changes lives here. When you choose a therapist from a professional body such as BACP you know they are fully qualified and expected to uphold a high level of professional and ethical standards. There's a complaints and conduct process on the rare occasion there's a problem. For reassurance my most recent qualifications are: BA (Hons) Person-Centred Counselling (First) - Metanoia Institute Certificate in Ecotherapy - Tariki Buddhist Trust Yoga Teacher - Vajrasati Yoga School Sports & Remedial Massage Therapist - NLSSM Yoga Nidra Facilitator - Yoga Nidra Network I'm currently studying with the NAOS Institute an Advanced Couple and Relationship Therapy Diploma, which will conclude in 2025.
  • Where are you based?
    Currently I am based online so that people form all over the UK and beyond can access therapy with me. Online Counselling Benefits Convenience Speak to me at a time that suits you. Accessibility Everyone can benefit from a professional, confidential and skilled listener sometimes. Whether you live in the UK or further afield, I can help with online counselling services that suit you. Feel Comfortable Being able to talk in the comfort of your own home provides a valuable service for people who might not otherwise be able to see a counsellor in person. Online Therapy for You Online counselling with me can lead to a healthier, happier mind so that you can flourish and thrive.
  • How do I book an appointment?
    Send me an email through my contact form and we'll find a time and date that works for the both of us to have an initial 20 minute free video call.
  • When are you available?
    I work Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday from 10am until 7pm.
  • What is Person-Centred Therapy?
    Person-centred counselling is one of the humanistic approaches founded in the 1940s by the American psychologist Carl Rogers. He believed that, given the right conditions, a person can reach their full potential and become their true self. To help you achieve your full potential I will offer you: unconditional positive regard (UPR) – accepting and valuing you congruence - being honest and transparent in how I experience you and your world empathic understanding – seeing your viewpoint as if I were you When you’re attending counselling sessions with me, you’ll be encouraged to bring your own issues to the session – the counselling is led by you and not directed by me. Many clients, with no prior knowledge of counselling, believe that the counsellor will sort their problems out for them. I'll help you to explore your own issues, feelings, beliefs, behaviour, and worldview, so you can become more self-aware and achieve greater independence. Discover your own abilities I will help you to realise what resources and support are available to you that you can use to work through your own issues, build your self-confidence and appreciate that you always have options. I will treat you as the expert on yourself, as no-one else knows exactly what it’s like to be you! I will not judge you, no matter what you bring to the session. This helps build a trustworthy relationship in which you can feel free and supported to disclose whatever is troubling you. Eventually it will lead you to discover your own abilities and autonomy, so that you can cope with current and future problems. Edited version of this article (original) from :
  • There are so many therapies out there and I'm confused! How do I know that Person-Centred counselling will work?
    Person-centered therapy focuses on the individual's subjective experience and personal growth, and aims to create a non-judgmental and empathic therapeutic relationship. There is a substantial body of research that supports the effectiveness of person-centered therapy in treating a range of mental health issues, including anxiety, depression, and interpersonal difficulties. Here are some key findings: A meta-analysis of 86 studies found that person-centered therapy was as effective as other therapies in treating a range of mental health issues, and that its effectiveness was not limited by factors such as therapist experience, client age, or type of problem being treated (Elliott et al., 2013). A systematic review of 18 studies found that person-centered therapy was more effective than no treatment or placebo in reducing symptoms of depression and anxiety, and that its effects were similar to those of other evidence-based therapies (Lambers et al., 2015). A randomized controlled trial comparing person-centered therapy with cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) for social anxiety disorder found that both therapies were equally effective in reducing symptoms, but that person-centered therapy led to greater improvements in self-esteem and interpersonal problems (Leichsenring et al., 2013). A study of the long-term effects of person-centered therapy found that clients who received this therapy showed greater improvement in symptoms of depression and anxiety than those who received a different therapy, and that these improvements persisted for up to 5 years after treatment (Elliott et al., 2004). Overall, the research suggests that person-centered therapy is an effective approach to psychotherapy that can help individuals address a wide range of mental health issues. I hope this has been helpful :)
  • What can therapy help with?
    I've linked you to an article which highlights an A-Z of issues and concerns which may be helped by talking to me. Person-centred therapy can help with many difficult life problems - from coping with traumatic experiences and events, to dealing with depression and anxiety or managing harmful emotions and behaviours. To see the full article visit the BACP website here Let me know what kinds of issues you are looking to explore in therapy.
  • How many sessions should I have?
    In our introductory video call we can talk about the frequency and number of sessions you might like to have. Some clients come for a single session and others prefer long term therapy. We can discuss this in our call together. You will decide when it's time to end therapy, when you no longer need the support of my counselling service.
  • Do you have a contract? What does that mean?
    Yes. I will share with you a contract which outlines the agreements we make together for the therapeutic work to come. This will cover things like : costs, frequency, confidentiality, cancellations, safeguarding, data sharing etc. You will be asked to sign this before we can begin our work together. We may need to refer back to this shared agreement in the future so it is a useful document to keep a copy of.


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Hi my name's Tom and my ethos is to offer you space to be yourself, to honour your needs and to empower you to thrive. You are welcome to come as you are and together we'll find the right direction for you!


Thanks so much for taking the time to reach out and begin the next step of seeking support. We all need help sometimes and I'm honoured that you're here.

I'm curious about what you might need next and how you would like to work together? 

It is important for me to let you know that you're going to be leading the work in these sessions and I'll be alongside you every step of the way. 

I believe in you and your capacity to change, grow and thrive when given the support you need. That's the power of the therapeutic relationship and this is my area of expertise and experience.

Drop me an email right now and let me know what's going on with you and where you'd like to be heading in life. I'll reply as soon as I can.

Look forward to meeting you soon.

All the best,



You're taking your choice of counsellor seriously and I appreciate the efforts you're making to find out about me and my approach. You may find what you've been looking for. Keep reading and I'll share a little more about what I can offer you and how you can book your free 20 minute introductory video call. 

Rainbow Flags



Sometimes intimate relationship don't go as expected and you can lose contact with yourself or the other.  Couples and relationship therapy can help you get back on track, assist with negotiating endings like divorce and separation,  helping to deal with the fallout from infidelity and affairs, improve communication, strengthen resilience and unstick unhelpful patterns.


Painful and traumatic life experiences can leave us feeling lost, hurting, afraid and frozen. You might be feeling ready to begin exploring the impact of these experiences on your life.


Together we will use cutting edge grounding techniques from neuroscience to bring about states of calm, safety and stability back into your life.  


You may feel overwhelmed by life, lacking hope, purpose and meaning. This could manifest as a low level feeling of dread or despair. Perhaps you find yourself catastrophising?  There is hope! Together we'll unpick those unhelpful narratives and support you to find connection and relief from worry, anxiety or low mood.


You are curious about what your body has to tell you and want to tune in to those gut feelings. Together we can find ways that are safe for you to be with your body and your breath and learn what the message is, integrating this wisdom into your life. 


You need a safe space to explore all that life throws at you. I offer LQBTQ+ affirmative therapy where your gender, sexuality and relationship diversity are welcomed, whilst acknowledging the other areas of life that you may wish to focus on.  I spent two years working with an LGBTQ+ counselling service and have the experience to meet you where you are in a non judgemental, acceptant and honouring way. 


Addiction takes many forms and has different roots for everyone. The antidote, according to Gabor Mate, is connection. We'll explore what's missing in your life, what you need and co-create strategies that fit your experience and needs. 


Perhaps you find talking things through challenging and want to access different parts of you that you know are pushing up to be heard. Using play & creativity in the sand tray you can drop in and explore what's really going in. I'll be there right beside you every step of the way. 


Do you ever get that sinking feeling that life is happening and you're missing it? The seasons change. The sun rises and sets. The Moon waxes and wanes.  Research shows us that time outdoors and nature connection can change your life in positive life enhancing ways. Join the adventure in woods, parks and open spaces around the UK. Sign up to my mailing list for upcoming events. 


You're curious about spirituality, your path and the journey of life as an ever folding mystery. You might be wanting to talk through personal revelations, integrate psychedelic experiences or make changes that put you back in the flow. 


Yoga Nidra is a profound practice of letting the body fall into deep rest.  You will be exploring the space between waking and sleeping. This is a restorative practice that is particularly helpful for calming the nervous system, reducing anxiety and stress. 


These guided relaxations are best experienced lying down in a comfortable position where you will not be disturbed.  Use plenty of pillows, blankets and bolsters so that your body feels supported. 

They are free for you to listen to and download here

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